An earful of blessing

Listening can be good.  Listening, rather than always talking, that is.  It takes me out of the driver’s seat, presenting opportunity to see into the life of another, offering the reminder that little ol’ me isn’t really at the center of things.  This week I visited 2 friends in the hospital—one who awaits a liver transplant, and another who’s enduring kidney transplant complications.  They’ve both dealt with all kinds of hardships and excruciating pain, yet to hear them talk, it’s their love of the Lord at the forefront.  Seeing Him in their gentle, gracious ways inspires me and has caused me to sit and ponder a number of things.  Not too long ago, I was inspired through another friend as well.  I’d been praying for him to find a job, but somehow we had never talked about houses or apartments or anything.  I had no idea he lived at the Salvation Army shelter.  I’d never heard him complain about living arrangements, and indeed how I admired his mindset to press on and look forward.  In my neighborhood, I've found a wonderful joy in the form of a German shepherd down the street.  Hearing him bark and seeing him wag his tail to greet his master sets my heart afloat.  It takes a few seconds to slow down, listen, and watch this dog, but his utter joy is contagious.  James 1 says we should all be quick to listen and slow to speak.  Some say that’s why the Lord gave us 2 ears and only 1 mouth.  May we seek Him for how to listen today—with the neighbor who's lonely, perhaps with the aunt who so readily criticizes or the guy in the office with the insanely crazy clothes, yet certainly still affording ourselves time to listen for the voice of the Lord himself.  Whether two minutes or twenty or more, blessing lies within.

The wandering man at the festival

` I saw a man from within the crowd.  He walked alone.  He walked in circles sometimes.  Both days, he frequented our corner of the Hills Alive festival, which was held in Rapid City’s downtown park.  He looked at the ground mostly, not connecting verbally with anyone, though he did pause occasionally to watch children.  Given the 90-degree heat, I wanted to offer him a drink of cold water, yet an occasion with a photographer caused me to wait.  In pursuit of photographing a girl, the photographer crossed paths with the man, who seemed to not understand the camera.  He peered up into the lens, almost touching it with his nose.  Something about his reaction to the photographer made me hesitate to approach him with any water.  Perhaps my approach would confuse or scare him.  Later the crowd grew denser, and where the man went I don’t know, but I thought about him many times.  The whole festival was a wonderful time of music and testimony.  For the organizers to offer free admission is quite remarkable, realizing other festivals charge $100+.  It was entirely fun to see a friend from San Antonio hosting a booth there.  And I smile to remember a lady at a different booth who noted my use of the word “y’all,” reminding me all over again that Toto and I weren’t in Texas anymore.  Yet still today, I think of the wandering man.  The Lord connected me with him for a reason.  Praying for him was another highlight of the festival.  Without knowing his name or any details of his life, I am privileged still now to ask the Lord to protect him and provide for his needs.  May he know Jesus as his Savior.

Not a Sunday stage

The big stage doesn’t always attract.  People exit the building dissatisfied.  Some wonder why life feels flat.  They become angry and critical, and soon the whole subject of church has grown sour.  So we ask, “What are we looking for on Sundays?”  Perhaps consider blessings of a different size and shape.  Not all God's gifts are wrapped tall and pretty in the main sanctuary.  Consider the parking lot.  For me it’s been a wonderful place of prayer.  Last Sunday someone new inquired about piano lessons, and the inquiry sent me back to that hot, sweaty day in the parking lot a year ago when multiple people offered prayers on my behalf for this issue of piano lessons.  How I've been blessed to relive those initial prayers.  I stand in amazement to look upon the Lord’s blessings since then.  The parking lot has been a place I’ve found people needing physical help, such as the lady who fell between the street curb and the concrete steps.  Sometimes it’s opportunity to offer someone a ride to the bus stop or invite them to lunch.  Also reconsider maybe an unlikely place—the women’s restroom.  Sometimes the restroom serves as its name implies, as actually a place of rest.  Girls go there to find a tissue when they’re crying.  They go there to see if the crying made their mascara run.  Women go there to regain composure when the antics of their children have tested their last nerve.  Sometimes they’re there because the music is too loud or the seating is too crowded.  Basically there’s something uncomfortable for them, and they’re seeking respite.  It’s opportunity to offer help.  It's opportunity to listen, maybe talk, and see the Lord at work.  The point being that church is more than any single event in a single room on any given day.  The platform at the front of the room is not a stage.  It's not a concert.  Church is people.  We love as the Lord first loved us, and we look to know Him in whatever circumstances He brings.  May He give us joy for opening those packages that deliver to side doors and parking lots.

The openness of the 119th

I ask for many things.  The other day, it was for help while phone shopping among too many bundle choices.  A few minutes ago, it was for wasp-killing in the kitchen.  Somehow every time I wanted to swat the wasp, the cat was in the way, and we provided each other frustration and comic relief both.  The point being that I’m often asking the Lord for something specific, whether help with a phone purchase or a job or health or something else.  Yet I read Psalm 119 and see something different.  The psalmist speaks of praise and rejoicing and meditating on precepts, of delighting in the Lord and guarding against deceit.  Lots of whole-being things rather than specifics.  Lots of declaring His righteousness, obeying His statutes, and finding good in affliction, which are much bigger aspects of living than any single pesky wasp in the kitchen.  This psalm models for us a wonderfully open time with the Lord.  Enjoy letting Him mold our thought patterns overall.  Savor the openness of not knowing how exactly He will enter our lives each day.  Leave the ball in His park, so to say, to amaze us and grow us, without our always dictating a laundry list of “Help me with this” and “May I have that?”  Even my encounter with this psalm was by His orchestration. 

Fragmented, useful, & in perfect time

The timing was impeccable. All the postponements held their own human reasons, but now each was revealing the larger purpose of God. Only on this particular Sunday would the missionaries to Nicaragua be sitting with us on our back 2 rows. Exciting already was seeing the Lord’s message given through our pastor align with the message given to me, but then my heart leaped higher still to hear the guys going to Nicaragua explain how the Lord gave them the same message. At the end of the service when the one young man mentioned not understanding Spanish, my ears perked up. Evidently the only part he understood in our Spanish congregation that morning was my English portion. My fragmented Spanish usually fizzles out midway, and I start inserting some English. As much as I’ve wanted to know the whole Spanish vocabulary, here today I was amazed to see my fragments being actually useful. This young man echoed and expounded: “If God calls you to do something, go do it. Even if we don’t understand everything, we’re still supposed to go. The Lord’s grace will be sufficient.” Some of the other guys heading to the airport that afternoon didn’t know Spanish either, yet they felt called by the Lord and were pressing forward to go. I had testified about the Lord leading my husband and me to our Spanish congregation a year and a half ago, though I knew even less of the language then. In the beginning, I didn’t see how the Lord would grow my Spanish for use in the hospital and on the streets. Interestingly, earlier this Sunday morning, I attempted to rehearse my testimony but to no avail. My stomach felt strangely sick when I tried to rehearse, as if the Lord was diverting me from trying to memorize anything. I sensed the testimony was to be a casual conveyance of how the Lord is at work in the midst of our everyday living, always cuing people and places in perfect time. Because the testimony was unrehearsed, my Spanish was certainly fragmented, and the message was accentuated and dispersed for all involved. It was a fresh glimpse of the Lord's orchestration. All the more, I am encouraged to follow Him beyond what I can see. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding,” says Proverbs 3:5.

Children of the NICU

Think hospital.  Think needles and probes.  Think what it’s like for the youngest.  They’ve hardly entered this world, and already their bodies struggle.  Yet there’s a song that comforts them.  My friend sings, “Jesus loves the little children, all the children of the world.”  She sings of how precious they are to Him, and she sees a little crease forming at the side of their small mouths, lifting into a smile.  She cuddles these young ones who often haven’t known life outside their hospital incubator.  No puffy white clouds in a blue sky.  No sunshine or fresh outside air.  They live among beeps and blinking lights and sterilized equipment.  My friend initiates some of their first conversations, introducing them to the scenery of their future walks in the park.  Some endure the loss of their twin who is healthy and already at home.  Many love the quiet, exhibiting a cringe at any loud clanking.  They enjoy the comfort of the Cuddler’s heartbeat that follows the rocking motion of her chair.  The sense of touch is a wonderful blessing.  My friend sees their tensions soften, and their reaction compares to the gentle release of air from a balloon, in that their little arms and legs finally realize a way to relax.  She often rests a baby on her shoulder or nestles one in her forearm, blessed also to meet many moms and dads who talk of their own side of the trauma.  It’s an opportunity to lessen the burden of a scenario that's difficult for many.  I think of her soft voice singing the name of Jesus to each little ear, resting in each little bed, being blessed by the only perfect Love that knows the intricacies of their medical situations.  Inside the walls of the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, the Lord is present, bringing us to the aid of each other.

Teacher vs. teacher

In Matthew 23:10, Jesus cautions the crowds.  The hypocritical ways of the Pharisees are not to be followed.  The teachers of the law had been seeking the attention of men, and Jesus stepped in to encourage everyone to do the opposite.  Respect this role of teacher, He said, but don’t imitate their self-serving ways.  He instructs, “Nor are you to be called ‘teacher,’ for you have one Teacher, the Christ.”  And upon reading that sentence, I suddenly paused.  How do we view this role of teacher?  I have known the role of schoolteacher to be humbling, for I have seen students pose questions for which I had no immediate answer.  I have known the role of parental teacher to be humbling, for when needing to teach my daughters to share their toys, I quickly remembered one time not wanting to share my Hershey's chocolate.  Never do I want to approach a teaching role on the assumption I have a final understanding of any particular subject, for there's always a new perspective to come.  Yet with another kind of humility, I’ve learned also not to automatically decline a teaching role because I lack qualifications on paper.  The Lord may want to teach someone through me, even without formal schooling on my part.  Years ago, some fellow piano players offered me their overflow of piano students, yet I rather quickly declined.  More recently, some friends asked me to teach piano, and I dismissed the notion again.  Yet these friends persisted, and I finally asked the Lord what to do.  I don’t hold a music degree.  Neither did I study at a music conservatory.  The Lord has been my music teacher primarily, and on the occasions I did study through a formal school or private instructor, it was mostly oboe.  Turns out I’ve now been immensely blessed to teach piano, sharing openly about the Lord as our ultimate Teacher.  He guides both me and my dear friends who are students.  And with church, when asked to teach about the Bible and the Lord, I rely on the Lord’s qualifications.  On formal paper, I have only CEUs.  No Bible college degree.  Yet what a joy to share with others my experiences with the Lord.  He is the only One for whom I spell teacher with a capital T.

Leaping with Daniel

I awoke early, early, early.  Too early for my choosing.  The idea in my head was to host Bible study on Daniel 5.  King Belshazzar has a banquet that leads to trouble, and suddenly the fingers of a human hand write a message on a wall of the royal palace.  People use the phrase “the writing’s on the wall” without referencing the Bible, and that would be the point of the study:  to read the actual stories from which these indirect usages have come.  I emailed friends to see if anyone was available to study at the house, and lo and behold, here they come, and I’m so happy for a new friend to join us too.  Midway through our time together, I hear this new friend say how perfectly this study fits her personal circumstances.  And as she started explaining, my heart began to melt.  Here the Lord had awakened me days ahead about a certain topic for the sake of someone who would attend our study, yet whose email address I didn’t even have.  He would make certain she received an invitation, in whatever way He deemed best, which I later learned was through one of our ladies who is her dear friend.  Indeed the Lord loves us that much—that He brings together many for the sake of one, setting our feet on paths that lead to things we’re unaware of, bestowing blessings in all kinds of directions.  Earlier in the week, I had been frustrated at not finding some notes I’d written last year that would relate to our study this week.  Yet when my new friend commented on the perfect match within these verses of Daniel, I realized it was good for me not to find those notes because they contained other references that could’ve distracted me.  The Lord had let my eyes see only what He intended.  His orchestrations do amaze me.  I’m like the one on the street who stands motionless in the midst of loud honks and heavy traffic, with my mouth agape, wondering afterward if my jaw really did hit the ground.  I'm not really unaware of the surrounding traffic, but I'm spellbound at times to witness the Lord at work.  Motionless on the outside, yet giant leaps of joy within. 

To repair William Tell's overture

No time to lament.  Our initial shock came backstage, and we scrambled to consider options.  It was time for the chase scene, and should we attempt it without our usual William Tell overture?  Our sound system had crashed.  And what about our individual microphones and the rest of the music?  It was only Monday, and we had 6 more performances that week.  What to do for a trio of actors from out of town?  Imagine gyms full of kids, and would anybody be able to hear anything without the sound system?  That afternoon ushered us through a host of phone calls, some in search of a repairperson, some to touch base with the rest of our schools, and one to call in a lunch order for fast pick-up.  All the while, we asked the Lord to guide our path.  A trip to Guitar Center introduced us to a very kind staff who sympathized and quite generously offered their time.  A recommendation to Guitar and Banjo Studio connected us with an electrician who diagnosed our transistor problem.  Even reaching that point was mentally taxing, given our narrow timeframes and the miles that separated the stores.  Through all our phone calls and jaunts on the road, and amidst our regular loading and unloading of stage equipment and even the basics of locating the different schools and driving to each one, the Lord's timing did prove impeccable.  At each school, He brought together an in-house sound system, whether using clip-on mics or hand-held or stand-alone ones, each occasion being accompanied by a new amazement for the sufficiency of His provision.  From the children came wonderful levels of attentiveness as well as lively participation and hearty laughter, lending us to realize the Lord's blessing upon them as well.  And we did pick up our sound system from the electrician in perfect time for our last performance of the week.  All along the way, the Lord tossed in reminders of His presence.  One afternoon, having collected our to-go lunchboxes from McAlister’s Deli, I opened my horseradish roast beef and did munch to my heart’s delight, just so thankful for some nourishment in the quick recess between venues.  But then I saw a sheet tucked behind the sandwich, and in it was a pickle.  Something so simple brought an escape for me.  It seemed each bite of that pickle was flavorful enough to lift me out of our hectic pace.  As long as I ate that pickle, my backache disappeared, my heart quit racing, and my mind was quiet, except to tell my fellow actors how freshly I was blessed by that pickle.  I remember our director telling us ahead of time, “Oh, Monday afternoon should be leisurely.  Maybe we can go to the hotel pool.”  The closest we came to the pool was to peer at it through a window on our way to collapsing on our beds at night.  But we left town having seen the Lord at work.  And that's exciting indeed.

Curly ribbon & waiting

The prize was $10 for guessing closest to the actual number of jelly beans in the jar.  I waged my guess at 171, and soon I merrily tucked $10 into my purse.  Should I buy lunch at Chick-fil-A?  Maybe Pei Wei?  The answer was neither.  I had asked the Lord what to do, and thereafter I kept picturing the face of a new friend.  I wanted to compile a care package for her, in hope of easing the near-exhaustion she felt from travelling so many weekends.  Ten dollars would buy her some healthful snacks for the road and some other things just for fun.  For her early mornings, I bought Target’s version of Nutri-Grain berry bars.  Just for fun, I bought some Bugles, some peanut M&Ms, and a few other items.  A bottle of green tea can be refreshing anytime, so I put one of those in the basket too.  At home, I bundled everything together and added purple and green curly ribbons dangling on the outside and stamped her a colorful card that included Philippians 1:3, because each remembrance of her really does sweeten my day.  The next Sunday, I would be so happy to present her the gift.  But next Sunday I didn’t see her.  The Sunday after that, I didn’t see her.  The next month, I didn’t see her.  Two months later, I still hadn’t seen her.  Four months later, still no sign of her, and truly my heart was heavy.  Each Sunday morning, I put her package in the car, and each Sunday afternoon, I took the undelivered package back into the house.  I fluffed the ribbons back into place, smoothing their creases, and placed the package again in its weekday residence on my dresser.  I held such high hope for seeing my friend again.  Occasionally the notion surfaced to unwrap everything and piece the items apart into our kitchen pantry, but entertaining that thought made me feel I was abandoning the whole friendship.  From the start, I had felt strongly compelled to prepare this package, and here now I determined again to hold on and keep asking the Lord for another opportunity to see my friend.  And then it happened.  Almost 6 months of waiting, and there she was.  I walked in late and sat on the opposite side of the congregation.  Peering to the side, I noticed her distinctively dark curly hair flowing near her shoulders.  I could feel the corners of my mouth jump up into a smile.  Even more, I could feel my heart swell.  The hard part would be waiting till after the sermon to leap across the aisle to give her the biggest hug ever.  She explained her absence, and I explained my care package.  It was an occasion that brought immense joy for having waited upon what the Lord set in motion months before.  In the words of Philippians 1:6, what He had begun, He had carried to completion.